hello there. my name’s elena, and i’m a recovering people-pleaser. yes, that’s right. a recovering people-pleaser. the long + short of it is that i used to care so much about what others thought of me that i let their opinions define me and my worth. and now? well, now i don’t.
the journey to get to this place has not been an easy one, the road often littered with unexpected speed bumps, twists + turns i never saw coming. not every day is an easy one. i still have moments of weakness, slightly-hysterical crying fits when i find out someone has said something unkind about me (o. m. g. i am SO DRAMATIC
SOMETIMES ALL THE TIME). but the older and wiser i get, i see now that all this life is a continual work in progress, and the journey really is more important than the destination.
because really, the truth is that not everyone is going to be your friend. even when you try your hardest to be accepted. even when you conform in attempts to make yourself fit in. there’s always going to be someone who just. doesn’t. like. you. now, i know it hurts. i spent literally years of my life with a bruised and tender heart because of the words and actions of others. though i tried to kill ‘em with kindness and take the higher road, there were still people who consistently held the sins of my past against me. they looked not at my heart and the growth i was making but only at the mistakes i’d made along the way. they judged. they talked. they rejected me. and it hurts. but let me tell you something.
what somebody else thinks of you or says about you does not, in any way, shape, or form, diminish your worth. sure, you’re not perfect and sure, you’re going to stumble + fall from time to time. but that is the beauty of these messy, human heart-souls we live with. there will come a day when we truly will know perfection, and it will be glorious, but we are not there yet. and still, even in the not-there-yet, in the messy, mistake-making flesh we inhabit, you are worthy. you are important. you matter. despite what they say about you. despite how they treated you. their opinion is not the one that matters, dear heart. seek to listen to the only one that does.
[Photo from randallo on Flickr]
because He looks at you with eyes of love, and His heart burns with zeal for you.
because He knit you together in your mother’s womb, declaring you fearfully and wonderfully made.
because He gave you a life of purpose, and He knows every plan He has for you.
because He sees the beginning from the end, and He knew every situation you’d find yourself in.
because He doesn’t focus on what you’ve done or who you were, but instead He looks at the person He created you to be.
because you’re never too far gone, too messed-up, too lost for Him to find you.
because His arm is not too short to save.
because His love for you is never-ending, nor is it conditional. it doesn’t come and go based on the choices you make. it just is.
and once you understand that, once you really get it deep down in your bones, all up under your skin, you’ll begin to be freed from the insecurity, from the lies that say there’s something wrong with you.
and then maybe you can join me + all the other recovering people-pleasers here on the sidelines, where we cheer on each other towards the truth and greatness, where we can we rest content in our messy skins because we have seen what redemption tastes like: a little bit like being known, a little bit like being loved, and a little bit like coming home.