Finding Home, Part Three: Chasing Ghosts

If you’ve been following my story, you’ll know that in late 2017, I started asking questions to try and gather more information about my birth father and my ancestry. It started with a yearly checkup at the doctor’s office and a questionnaire I had to fill out about family history. Literally more than half of it was left blank because I simply didn’t know how to answer. I know it might not seem like a … Read the rest

Finding Home, Part Two: The Waiting

It’s been over a month since I shared with you that I am on a journeya journey to recover the lost pieces of myself; to find a solid footing in the roots of my ancestors; to take back the story that was stolen from me by an absent father and a buried heritage.

It’s been three weeks since I dropped my DNA collection kit in the mail, sending it off to a … Read the rest

one word 2018: well

It’s that time of year again.
We’re just a few days away from January and new year’s resolutions and fresh starts, so naturally I’ve started thinking about #OneWord365 and what word I’m going to lean into in 2018. Some years, I choose the word with intentionality, a specific goal in mind. Other years, the word chooses me. It comes to me unexpectedly–the first thought upon waking in the morning or washing breakfast dishes or, … Read the rest

How to survive the run-on sentence seasons of life

I’ve felt it running after me for a while now:

The lure of more, more, more; of adding just one extra thing; of filling in every square on the the calendar with this event or that meeting; of staying up too late and waking up too early; of cramming things in during the day’s leftovers; of fighting for a seat at the table; of dissatisfaction and ‘the grass is greener on the other side’ … Read the rest

The one where I make a big announcement (because it’s never too late to begin)

350 words. This is what being brave means for me this morning. 

After years of running away from the inevitable, I have finally started writing my book! For years, I’ve thought a lot about writing a memoir, but I always stopped short of beginning it, citing a litany of reasons (time, money, energy, inspiration) why I can’t. But today, I’m turning “I can’t” into “I will.”

Because I’m full of stories, and they deserve to … Read the rest

finding faith: part iii (the works of my hands)

this december, i will be 33 years old–and i’m quite sure that i still have no idea what i want to be when i grow up.

i’ve lived many lives up until this point, and i believe i’ve lived them well (to the best of my ability, anyway). something about this new one, though; it feels different somehow.

i’ve worked since i was fourteen years old, even earlier if you count all those under-the-table babysitting … Read the rest

finding faith: part i

it is late-September here, which means we’re in that mysterious time of the in-between place–the days are still warm, but they’re also getting shorter; summer is struggling to hang on, but the truth is we’re on the cusp of colder winds and leaves too near death to remain on their branches.

autumn is my favorite time of year, and i always find myself eager to rush my way through the other months to get … Read the rest

one word 2016:: grow.


in lieu of new year’s resolutions (and to show support and solidarity with the #oneword365 movement), i’ve spent the last several januarys of my life carefully choosing a word that i hope will shape the coming year. this is perfect for me for a couple different reasons:

a) it doesn’t lock me into anything. selecting a word over a resolution is open-ended. it leaves room for mistakes and loose ends, and it allows the … Read the rest

the long way home

a few weeks ago, i had a dream. one of those dreams that stays with you, not just into the waking hours, but days later. some dreams are just that–dreams, nothing more. but this one… i remain convinced this one meant something, means something still.

in my dream, i was at a graduation of sorts. i was waiting backstage in my cap and gown, ready to walk across the stage and into a new future. … Read the rest

lovely

this one’s for the women, i think.

see, i’ve felt this stirring in my soul for weeks now. it’s truth, but it’s a hard truth, one that’s easy to forget, easy to let slip away. still, it will not let me go–that’s the thing about truth. it won’t allow itself to be ignored.

and so i keep circling around it, keep coming back to the same thing, the same message. truth must be told, Read the rest